Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Randomize
