can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
