Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
