Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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