she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
