i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
