I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
