i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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