You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
