But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
