My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
im holly from the hills drunk
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
