its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
