Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
