He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
