that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Also, beer. Big fan.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
