i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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