So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Randomize
