Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
