oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Randomize
