Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just gift wrapped bread.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
