I just pynch a tree in the face
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
