i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize