the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
ttyl tear gas
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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