I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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