apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
