soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
