I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
