I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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