I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
