Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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