I cannot find my penis.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
