Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize