I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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