Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My pussy is not your playground.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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