Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
