I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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