i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
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