The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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