i don't plan on having that self control this summer
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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