smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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