Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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