but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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