I must be too annoying 4 u.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Randomize
