But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
My life is pants optional.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
