She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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