there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
