she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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