woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
