Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
