sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
